Ministers and Sex

In a recent study of pastors, currently in the ministry, some 21% have admitted being sexually indiscreet while married and in ministry. Of all those surveyed, 14% admitted to lying on the survey which leads one to surmise that an estimated 40% of pastors had been unfaithful while in ministry. (Dave Carder, 2007)

The minister who was sexually molested as a child, or was sexually promiscuous as a teen or has learning disabilities or ADHD is very much at risk for infidelity. The times at which any minister is most at risk is when one is hungry, angry, feeling lonely, tired or bored.

Other very surprising factors found that the younger a person was at the time he/she accepted Christ as Savior, the greater the risk for infidelity. Other surprises are that the higher the educational level of the minister, the greater the risk of infidelity. Some 90% of those admitting unfaithfulness felt “blindsided” by the affair. They just did not recognize the signs.

Most ministerial infidelity currently is between ministers and ministry assistants.

The internet pornography usage rate among ministers is estimated at 50% presently.

The younger generation of ministers appear to view pornography as "a little bit won’t hurt, just don't get addicted." (Dave Carder, 2007)

This should come as no big surprise when you recognize that there is an intimate connection between our spirituality and our sexuality. As God is three-in-one and we are made in His image, we are also three-in-one. Our essential essence is our spirituality and the kind of spirituality we have is determined by our relationship with God. By the same token, our spirituality is expressed through our relationships. We always relate through our sexuality. Males relate as males and females relate as females.

It is through our sexuality that Satan has direct access to our spirituality.  Notice how often in scripture, where lists of sins are given, that sexual sins top the list.  Satan can affect our spiritual effectiveness by attacking us through our sexuality.

A critical area for ministers to be aware of is that of emotions.  The line that most ministers are not aware of is that of expressing their emotions to a female other than their wife or other family member.  It is okay for a woman to express her emotions to a male minister but the male minister should never express his deep emotions to a female outside of his spouse or family.  It is in this area that most ministers who have fallen have failed.

There are also other reasons such as a minister who is feeling stressed out or “burnt out.”  It basically is about being in pain and choosing the wrong medication for relief.  Rather than turning to God, the minister, or layman, turns to something sexual in this case.  It could also be overeating or other kinds of substance abuse.

It appears that most people and ministers in particular, have never been taught how to handle their emotions in a healthy manner.

Rev. E. Dixon Murrah
August 2, 2008
(Rev. August 4, 2008)